Christmas & Thanks

Just want to take a moment to thank everybody who has taken the time to read the blog, and all my colleagues who have shown such patience with the Works Council. The support from all sides has been very positive, and we are doing our best to get the best outcome for employees and the business.

And a good outcome seems on the way. After the announcements of last Friday, it seems there is security for those not moving and security for those who make the move. That seems the fair way to go.

Hopefully everybody gets a chance to relax and enjoy the Christmas break. Keep an eye out for more updates over Christmas, as there will be plenty of time to write...

Qualities and non-qualities - part 2

Here is the 2nd part of traits that are recommended not to be express in work or life.

11. Claiming credit that we don't deserve; the most annoying way to overestimate our contribution to any success.

12. Making excuses; the need to reposition our annoying behaviour as a permanent fixture so people excuse it.

13. Clinging to the past; the need to deflect blame away from ourselves and onto events and people from our past; a subset of blaming everyone else.

14. Playing favourites; failing to see that we are treating someone unfairly

15. Refusing to express our regret; the inability to take responsibility for our actions, admit we are wrong, or recognise how our actions affect others.

16. Not listening; the most passive-aggressive form of disrespect for colleagues.

17. Failing to express gratitude; the most basic form of bad manners.

18. Punishing the messenger; the misguided need to attack the innocent who are usually only trying to help us.

19. Passing the buck; the need to blame everyone but ourselves.

20. An excessive need to be "me"; exalting our faults as virtues simply because they're who we are.

Time to tidy up your life... Brian Patten

My last posting mentioned the need to tidy up, and it reminded me of a great poem by Brian Patten. It is called "It is time to tidy up your life!" and seems especially appropriate now.

It's a moment to review and re-think. In our company/community, we are pushed to think again about our lives. It's a result of something very basic and simple, that maybe some of us took for granted, being moved.

Our job is possibly moving to UK, and some of us might forget that only a few weeks before, we might have sat and complained about how we didn't like our manager, or colleagues, or direction of company, leadership, pay, empowerment, etc...

We are focused on the unfairness of the possible job re-location and in many ways rightly so. On the other hand, we have to remind ourselves of what we felt some weeks or months ago. Were we really happy in the job? Were we fulfilled, confident that we could express ourselves? Did we have frustrations and were they even enough to think about moving along if we got around to it?

It's a difficult situation for all, and I know many people in difficult circumstances, who were perfectly happy with their job, management and colleagues. And for those who just bought houses, or have built up a life here, it is a serious and tough thing to deal with.

And there are those who were frustrated, and who did want to make a move already - so for those it can be a chance to think again, and tidy up.

I own a house here in Amsterdam, and have built up my life here with friends. So the idea of moving is difficult. But at least I have a choice as I am not so fixed and had been thinking of a next move already - I see it as a chance to think again and see outside my current life. I feel for those who don't have the flexibility to make the choice so easily.

Enjoy the poem.

It is time to tidy up your life!
Into your body has leaked this message.
No conscious actions, no broodings
Have brought the thought upon you.
It is time to take into account
What has gone and what has replaced it.
Living your life according to no plan
The decisions were numerous and
The ways to go were one.

You stand between trees this evening;
The cigarette in your cupped hand
Glows like a flower.
The drizzle falling seems
To wash away all ambition
There are scattered through your life
Too many dreams to entirely gather.

Through the soaked leaves, the soaked grass,
The earth-scents and distant noises
This one thought is re-occurring.:
It is time to take
Into account what has gone,
To cherish and replace it.

You learned early that celebrations
Do not last forever,
So what use now the sorrows that mount up?
You must withdraw your love from that
Which would kill your love.

There is nothing flawless anywhere,
Nothing that has not the power to hurt.
As much as hate, tenderness is the weapon of one
Whose love is neither perfect nor complete.

Coaching yourself

I have been reading a book called "Coach Yourself to Success". If I had seen the book on the shelf, I would never have bought it because the title seems too, too obvious and cheap. But a friend of mine in Vienna was reading it in German, and in that language the title is "Coach dich selbst, sonst coacht dich keiner", or "Coach yourself because nobody else will do it for you". That's a title that means something for me.

The basic concept behind her book is that we put up with so many things in our lives and those things cause stress. The stress creates a loss of energy, and that loss of energy means we have no chance to focus solidly on the things we really want, because we have to deal with so many things we don't want (but that we put up with) in our daily lives.

One suggestion she makes at the beginning is to make a list of all the things that you put up with. This might be anything as diverse as a missing button from a shirt, through to a relationship we are unhappy in - and everything inbetween.

My own list consisted of clothes on the floor in my bedroom, pictures not put up, light fittings missing, untidy computer table, unneeded exercise machine in my spare room, being overweight, not contacting friends and family enough, an annoying colleague at work, bad sleep... I ended up with around 55 things that bothered me and that I accept in my life.

I immediately started to sort out the small stuff on the list - she suggested that you get the big stuff written down, but not worry about it to begin with because you need energy to deal with the big stuff. That will come from the small things being out of the way, making way for more energy. Within a weekend, I got rid of around 15 items on the list. Some have re-surfaced again (my computer table is a mess) but I will keep this process going over and over.

Well, I am only on chapter 11 of the 101 good ideas there are in the book. I will share more ideas from it later, and can highly recommend it to anybody who wants to make a change in their life.

Life Poem

I was sent this poem by a good friend. I hope they don't mind me passing this on. I really needed this today, because it started finally to hit me what I am going to miss about the people I know in my company if the proposal for the re-location goes ahead.

The word 'company' doesn't feel good these days.

I prefer to use the word "community", even though some people may find it out of place. I am genuinely inspired by the quality of people in the community that is my company.

My hero Tom Robinson once said "the word Community is a political statement. Politicians use it as in 'we should all be the same.' But being in a Community is not that we all have to be the same. We just have to accept the difference."

And I live by that. I try to accept the difference every day, enjoy the difference - in a company where we are full of difference - in a community of 50 nationalities. That is why I left England and came to this great place.

I came here because of diversity, difference of opinion, difference of culture, difference of perspective. I didn't come here to be the same as everybody else.

Please enjoy the poem.

Rumi - Guest House
This being human is a guest house,
every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond

Last Lecture

Hi, take a look at this video, link sent to me by a good friend. It is a real lesson in life.

Why not just move to London?

So far, the idea to move 233 roles to London is still a proposal and details are being discussed between Management and the Works Council.

Nevertheless, I have been asked by so many people about why I don't just move back to the UK that I felt it would be fair to give my reasons.

I tell everybody that each individual has a different personal situation, and they have to decide themselves from that point of view. I also advise people that professionally, it is a good decision to go to London if they want to. It is clear that not everybody will move with the roles, so there will be space to develop careers for those who go. Of course it depends on package offered, etc, but I see that also as part of the personal, decision - everybody has a different idea of what an acceptable package is, so I can't comment on that. But in terms of opportunities, I truly believe those who make the move should see possibilities open up.

My own personal situation makes it almost impossible to move to UK ("almost" because "never say never" - but "almost" means highly unlikely). Before I moved to Amsterdam at age 30, I can't say I had a bad life. But in some way I was destined to feel at home in Amsterdam, which is how I have felt after being here for so many years.

When I grew up, we went on canal holidays for 13 years. This gave me an inbuilt love of water, and I love the canals in Amsterdam, as well as the water everywhere in Holland. Then we lived in a house next to a windmill (yes, really) from when I was 11 to 19 years old. My first business trip was to Amsterdam in 1993, during which I had my 26th birthday - I can still feel the hangover after trying to keep up with my bosses in the pubs during my birthday celebration. (Memorable moment of the trip - Glen asking for a beer, and being given the standard 'Vaasje', 30ML and a lot of froth. He looked disdainfully at it, drank it in 3 seconds and asked the barman "can I have 2 more please?")

So life was good as I grew up and made my first steps in my career. But as soon as I moved to Amsterdam, life started to get more interesting. Boundaries loosened, I met people from different places and cultures, I felt freed of a lot of English obligations to be polite and embarrassed most hours of the day, and took to Amsterdam life like it was home. And after a while, it has become my home.

The simplest way I can describe that feeling is the comment of another friend who came from abroad to work in the city. She said that after living in Amsterdam for a while, she felt like she had taken a mask off.

The obligations of being in your own country are subtle and binding, and of course can be very re-assuring. But making the brave move to live in another country, and taking in all it has to offer, whether good or bad, means a release and an openness to change which I can't go back on.

Home is made up of many things - people, physical home and belongings, surroundings, and maybe most of all a general feeling of well-being. The balance of these things for me has come together in Amsterdam.

In short, moving to London would be a personal step backwards, even if potentially it could lead to a professional step forward. It's a serious decision, and not something I take lightly. "Never say never". But Amsterdam is where I feel at home.